


Waking Up

by smilodonna



Category: RocknRolla (2008)
Genre: Canon-Typical Misogyny, Denial of Feelings, F/M fantasy (short), Hugging, M/M, Masturbation, Panic Attacks, Still No Kissing, and guess whose fault is that, at least, slooowly overcoming the denial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-29 20:36:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20802596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smilodonna/pseuds/smilodonna
Summary: One Two is realising his feelings more and more, and it scares the hell out of him.And Handsome Bob is just too good for this world.This can be read as a sequel to "Nothing's really happened, anyway" https://archiveofourown.org/works/20675744 , but honestly I just wanted to write about these two again, and it just happened that in this story they got an inch closer to where I wanted them ...





	Waking Up

**Author's Note:**

> Still happy for corrections, especially regarding the slang.

The ringing of his mobile jerked One Two out of his dreams with brutal force. It took him a moment to realise where he was. He had fallen asleep on the couch, obviously he had to catch up on sleep. Judging from the dim light seeping through the curtains it was quite early in the evening.

The phone rang again. One Two looked at the screen and answered with a grunt. „Bob.“

„Do you know what it does to me when you say my name like that?“ Bob purred through the line. He only got another grunt as an answer, which didn‘t seem to disencourage him in the slightest. He babbled away about meeting later at the Speeler, and Mumbles being a dick about something One Two didn‘t really understand, and guess who he ran into earlier … Handsome Bob got into this chatty mood from time to time, where he havered on and on about this and that for hours. Not that he was of the particularly silent kind anyway.

One Two slowly zoned out again to the sound of Bob prattling away. It didn‘t seem that Bob needed more input from him than the occasional grunt, and One Two was still knackered. The images before his eyes started to become more abstract, as did the voice in his left ear. It just felt good to lie there and let himself be carried away into dream land again. For once, One Two was at peace with the world.

Until that moment when he was pulled back to reality. The nice voice had changed, sounded urgent now: „One Two? Hey! Have you fallen asleep or what?“

He had, and with utter horror he realised what he had been doing in his doze. What he was still doing. Not that there was anything wrong about it per se, but, you know, the timing. That was bad, really bad. To put it plainly: He was stroking himself to the sound of Handsome Bob‘s voice.

On impulse, he grabbed the phone and threw it against the wall as hard as he could. Then he said there, panting and staring from the fragments of his mobile to his flagging cock and back again, and tried to calm down.

Just his body doing things it did when he was asleep, he reasoned. Just a coincidence. Him popping a stiffy didn‘t have anything to do with Bob‘s voice, fuck all. He‘d not even been fully awake in the first place. And he wouldn‘t be for much longer, he was still tired as hell. Groggily, he staggered over to his bed and collapsed like a house of cards.

Only, he couldn‘t find his way back to sleep anymore. While his brain was still busy finding explanations, his body wanted to go back to what it had started. There was no way One Two would be able to drift off again in his current state.

So he decided to do something about it. It took him a bit of an effort to visualise a well equipped girl, plush lips, large breasts and all, but then he could finally jerk off in peace. He imagined the bird riding him, moaning like anything, and soon his fist picked up pace while he felt his balls tighten. And then, just in the moment he let go and came with a strangled cry, the image changed, without himself having a say in the matter.

He‘d never seen Handsome Bob like that, of course not. Hadn‘t even imagined, why would he? But this could be what his body would look like, covered in sweat and moving in ecstasy – and this could be what thorough satisfaction would look like on his face. The vision seemed utterly real, and One Two froze in an unlikely mixture of horror and bliss. It took him a couple of minutes to be able to even move again, then he took off his vest and mechanically wiped himself clean. After that he just lay there, completely numb, not daring to think nor to feel, until he actually fell asleep again, Bob‘s filthy smile still haunting him.

He awoke to a faint but alarming noise: Someone was at the door, and obviously trying to get in. Within a heartbeat, One Two was on his feet and grabbed for the club he kept in a corner beside the bed for a situation like this. He was tiptoeing towards the dimly lit hallway, aware to stay in the shadow, when the door already swung wide open. Everything was quiet for a second or two, then a figure crept in, keeping their back to the wall, inching closer to where One Two stood hidden. He was just getting ready to strike, when he recognised the intruder.

„Bob! The fuck are you doing here?“

One Two switched on the light and looked at Handsome Bob, who squinted against the light and stepped closer, tucking away his knife. His _knife_? What the hell?

„You‘re alright, mate?“ Bob asked, sounding relieved.

„Yeah, close call. As I‘ve just stopped you from murdering me in my sleep.“

„Shit, I was worried, you know? Last thing I heard from you was some clash-boom-something, and then the line was dead and you didn‘t answer your fucking phone anymore, and I thought maybe someone attacked you ...“ His voice died away.

„So you thought you‘d better come over and take all the bad boys down with that toothpick.“ One Two decided to stop talking here, he‘d probably sounded too fucking emotional already. Stupid bastard, he hadn‘t asked him to put his life on the line for him, now had he.

He suddenly realised that he was standing there in his briefs, the cosh still in his hand. „I‘d better go find something to throw on“, he spluttered and made a beeline for the bedroom, ignoring Bob‘s mumbled „Bummer!“.

Shirt in hand and ready to pull it over his head, One Two stopped dead at the sight of his smudgy vest on the floor. Until now, he hadn‘t found the time to think of what had happened earlier in the night. Now the memories came back and hit him with full force. He stayed frozen on the spot until he heard Bob calling from the living room. Slowly, he turned around to see Bob appearing in the doorway with a quizzical look on his face.

„One Two?“ Why did his voice sound so fucking soft? Like he was talking to a hurt puppy or something. It was infuriating. „What happened?“

He couldn‘t answer that, now could he. He couldn‘t talk at all, couldn‘t even think, hell, _breathing_ was hard. His vision started to blur, and he felt ice cold fists squeezing his stomach, his lungs.

Suddenly, Bob was at his side, an arm around his shoulder. Some part of his brain registered that he still hadn‘t got a shirt on, but he couldn‘t have cared less. Bob‘s arm felt good, reassuring. He realised that Bob was talking. Well of course he was, that bloke could probably piffle on for days if no one stopped him. But One Two found he liked it. He payed no attention to the words, just listened to the sound. His breathing became steadier again, and he slowly came round.

He sat crouched down on the floor, Bob beside him slowly retracting his arm as if not to spook him. Was it bad he wanted it to stay there?

„My phone broke“, was all he could think of saying. His voice sounded far too small in his own ears, pathetic.

„Hmm. Found it“, Bob answered, „Let‘s get up, huh? Want me to make some tea?“

„Shit, Bob, I‘m not a fucking nursing case!“ One Two snapped, standing up. „I‘m just scared“, he added, in a much smaller voice. And regretted it immediately.

„What are you scared of?“ Bob asked calmly, getting to his feet as well. „One Two, look at me. You‘re a fighter, mate. You can face whatever scares you. Okay? I‘m here with you, please tell me ...“

„But it‘s you I‘m scared of, Bob, it‘s you! Don‘t you understand that?“ One Two stared at him, wild eyed.

Bob had taken a step backwards and was staring back, his eyes wide open. After a few seconds, a smile started to creep over his face and then made itself at home there. „No, One Two, you can‘t possibly be scared of _me_. Look, I‘m half a head smaller than you, and you‘re still the stronger and fitter one, no matter how hard I try.“

„Oh, shut up, Bob, you know that‘s not what I‘m talking about.“

Bob‘s face grew serious. „Course I know. But I want you to say it“, he retorted in a dangerously low voice. „You owe me that much, One Two, and you owe yourself that much. _What_ is it you are scared of?“

One Two tried to hold his gaze, but surrendered quickly. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. „I … I can‘t say it yet“, he uttered hoarsely. „I will, Bob, I promise. Give me some time. Just … oh shit, I know I‘m a coward. But … can you wait for me? Oh god, that sounds … Bob, please ...“

„Shhh“, Bob interrupted him, his voice just as hoarse, „It‘s okay. I‘ll wait. But now, I‘ll go home, alright? See you tomorrow, huh?“

One Two didn‘t want him to leave. But he couldn‘t say that, could he? He had no right to.

Slowly, he forced his eyes open, meaning to say goodbye for now, just for now, they‘d see each other again soon enough …

But when he saw the soft look on Bob‘s face, he blurted out „Stay!“, despite himself. „Please“ he added, feeling his face burn and fighting the urge to look away again, to hide from Bob‘s too intense gaze.

Bob tilted his head, smiling at him so fondly it made One Two feel dizzy.

„Okay, you git“, he all but purred. „Come here. That okay?“ And One Two found himself embraced by Bob‘s strong, warm arms. He was reminded of that night they had danced together, though this felt somehow completely different. So much better. He snuggled closer to Bob and rested his face against his. The angle was a bit awkward, but it felt good. Safe. The things he was afraid of could wait. Everything could wait. For now, he felt safe in Bob‘s arms, and that thought in itself should have been scary, but it wasn‘t.

„I won‘t be scared forever, you know“, he mumbled against Bob‘s stubbly hair. „I know“, Bob answered, holding him tight. „I know. You‘re being so brave right now, already, aren‘t you?“

„I‘m not“, One Two thought, „if I was brave we‘d be kissing already.“

But wasn‘t it amazing how little that thought scared him?


End file.
